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LINKS WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYIN THE DEPRESSION TOOL KIT contents/disclaimer “My life is over!” Have you ever said or thought this or had similar fatalistic thoughts? Quick, check your pulse. Make sure you're breathing. Alright, we established that your life is not over. It may, however, be different. Different doesn't mean over but it does mean time to re-evaluate and redefine your world. Will it be better or worse? I don't know. A big part of that will depend on your own outlook. You can't change events that have already happened. You can only modify your response to them. The Apostle Paul was imprisoned with his life hanging in the balance when he said, “I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.” Phil 4:11 previous next contents top Strive for excellence not perfection. This was part of a post on a friend's FB page. While it's important to reach for your best, perfection will not happen. Perfectionism leads to frustration, failure and depression. I've seen people damage and destroy (even ministries) the good they might do by unrealistic expectations. The apostle Paul was inprisioned with his life hanging in the balance when he said, “I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.” It may take 10 positive comments to counteract 1 negative. And while we frown on a prideful attitude, a good self-image is vital to living life effectively and in a state of wellness. There is a difference between haughtiness which is the pride the Bible teaches against and being secure an confident in your God given gifts and value as a human being. Now here's truth: You are probably not as bad as that negative comment made you feel and certainly shouldn't be defined by it. But you are also probably not as wonderful as that high compliment either. Humbly strive to reach for the best God has built in you and don't be stalled by riticism. When we suffer from depression we become very talented blamers. We can find all kinds of things to blame for our suffering. Even more problematic is the need to blame other people for our struggle. Sometimes that blame may even be justified. Still, at some point we need to arrive at a place where it's less a matter of who's right or who's wrong and more a case of achieving wellness. The final responsibility for our wellness lies only with us. Even God will not heal us until we let go of blame. previous next contents top We all want to believe that we are right. We usually think our right overrides the next person's right. The fact is sometimes we're right and sometimes we're wrong. Especially when we're symptomatic we need to be careful of our mindset. But this is also a fact sometimes they're right and sometimes they're wrong. Also be careful of opinions that can not be proven in your mind and spirit. previous next contents top There is a difference between being convicted (convinced) by the Holy Spirit and being convinced by man. Or for that matter our own preconceived notions. Expectations we place on ourselves due to the influence of others, tradition or our own ideas may not be God's. This can cause undo and unnecessary pressure and stress and leave us feeling discouraged. Our self image can be damaged when we're not meeting expectations. We may fear the loss of God's blessing unnecessarily. Seek God and be sure in your own heart what God wants from you and do not be crushed by the judgment of others. previous next contents top Pick 3 things about yourself that you would not give up. When you're feeling unhappy with yourself remember that if you were not you, you would not have those 3 things. Who we are is a package deal. What we like also comes with things that we don't like so much. Like a bag of Chex mix, you can eat all your favorite pieces first but you still have to deal with the rest of the stuff in the bag. So deal with what needs dealing but don't trash yourself along the way. previous next contents top
Human is what carries our presence around in the world. To deny and neglect our humanness is as as ridiculous as saying popcorn doesn't pop. Human needs to be fed, sheltered, nurtured, encouraged, appreciated, sometimes admonished, exercised and so on. So you're spiritual. That's a good thing. But remember you're only spiritual in this world if human is carrying you're spiritualness around. Subject your humanness to the Spirit but don't deny it or fail to take care of it. previous next contents top Two powerful words: yes and no. The power of yes is held in the fulfillment of necessary responsibilities and the willingness to make large or small sacrifices to serve one another which is a major aspect of love. However yes without constraints becomes self destructive. As our personal resources are continuously drained our yes's become motivated only by obligation and the expectation of others. The side effects then become resentment, exhaustion, injured physical and psychological health, intrusion on the yes's that are more appropriate, etc. Your love and joy become increasingly tapped and the power of yes becomes thwarted. “No” has much power to preserve the efficacy of your yes. The Bible call us to bear each others burdens. It doesn't single anyone but Christ to bear the burdens for everyone. Eventually you will not only be unable to bear everyone else's burden but you will lose strength to bear your own. The scripture also says “Let your yea be yea and your nay be nay.” This speaks to being decisive in your yes and no and not becoming involved with extensive explanations and justifications. So prioritize well and be committed not only to a healthy yes but also a healthy no where necessary, previous next contents top Much of functioning in society involves fitting the mold. This comes readily for some, not so readily for others. Understand that there is a price in bucking the mold. There's a price in everything even submitting to the mold. At the end of the day if you are true to God and to yourself but find yourself different, pay the price and learn to be at peace with it. previous next contents top Depression has many pedigrees. It may come from a string of difficult life situations. It may be learned through growing up in a depressive environment. It may be genetically stamped... large, small, short lived or life long. But here's the common ground: it scars life and disrupts the joy God intends for us. More people deal with it than you can imagine. And it effects those that care for them, also. Is there hope? There is God so there is hope. With Him on my side, I've fought the battle most of my life and I'm still standing. previous next contents top Many of you may be on medication. It may be a critical part of your treatment plan and should not be messed with without taking about it with your doctor. That being said it's also critical to be aware of potential side effects. Side effects can be devastating and sometimes become permanent so it is important not to ignore the risks. Sometimes they can sneak up on you and you don't even realize the medication. For years I had severe side effects and had no idea the meds where causing them so when the doctor asked about side effects I just said, I don't think so. The doctor will tend to ask a general question such as, “Have you noticed any side effects,” and not ask about specific symptoms. As such you need to be sure you are informed. When put on a new med ask the doctor about possible side effects. Talk to the pharmacist, read the paperwork and be aware of your body and mind. If you experience anything new after starting a med report it to your doctor whether it's a listed effect or not. Some side effects may not be immediately evident but may emerge in time. You are your last line of defense in assuring your medicine is an asset and not a detriment. previous next contents top
Many behaviors are reactive and not based on good consideration. Everything we do can be measured in payoff or cost. What's the payoff of your reactive behavior? Is the payoff greater than the cost or does the cost bring unnecessary consequences? We can learn to better manage reactive behaviors and in so doing reduce unnecessary cost to improve the payoff. This is the wiser investment. previous next contents top
So my son tells me there's a possum in his garbage can. He thinks it's hurt because it just laid there but it did blink. I told him it was probably just playing dead and if he laid down the can and left it alone it would probably go away. Sometimes we have issues that we thought have been fixed but they keep coming back. They were playing dead. They were possums. We need to resolve them and then lay down the can and let them go. And once our possums are truly dead, we need to learn how to intern them and never dig them up again. previous next contents top
Sometimes the enemy is not only the forces driving toward you. Sometimes the enemy is marching right by your side. Use wisdom in your associations and pray for discernment. A good friend is worth a million. An enemy disguised as a friend may cost you two previous next contents top
Burn out is the disaster of the well intentioned. It can happen even when you're involved in the most wonderful thing imaginable. Pray that God empowers you to fulfill the needs of the day and those things to which He has called you. Just as important, pray that He gives you focus on those things He has called you for and you don't try to spread yourself like a handful of seed on an acre of soil. previous next contents top
I know. It's a dirty word but I'm going to say it anyway. Exercise. Exercise can improve mood, lower stress and improve physical well being. The positive benefits of exercise can be medically verifiable. And don't kid yourself, even if you suffer from situational depression there is a physical component in the mix. A couple of hours of focused exercise can influence brain chemistry, blood chemistry, pulmonary health, muscular and skeletal stability and on and on. It is powerful medicine. previous next contents top
Denial is never a good thing. Denial only buries an issue which is still unresolved. Emotions tell us something is wrong and needs to be addressed. In the same way a slashing pain in our foot may tell us we're walking on broken glass and need to get off it, a pain in our emotions tells us some action is required. That being said acknowledging the situation and acting upon it needs to be done expeditiously and then we need to move on and focus on more positive things, There's no gain in spending our time dancing on broken glass. previous next contents top
Not everything bad that happen is because of your diagnosed disorder anymore than everything good that happens to others is because they don't have your disorder. While it's beyond question that your disorder can precipitate negative events, good and bad happen to healthy and sick people. Give the bad only the attention required to treat and resolve it. Seek out the good as the object of you attention. This won't happen automatically. It will require a willful choice, prayer and effort. previous next contents top Recognize joy wherever you find it. I haven't had a descent watermelon in a couple of years. I was ready to just never even buy them anymore. Then I tried one more. It was sweet, delicious and refreshing like the ones I remember from my youth. I experienced joy! Small joys count. What small joys are you allowing to hide behind a cloud of melancholy?
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